ONE TIME AT SCHOOL LET ME REMIND YOU I GO TO AN ALL GIRLS CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL SO THEY ALL WEAR SHOIRT ASS SKIRTS OKAY SO ONE TIME THIS GIRL LIKE TRIPPED AND HER SKIRT FLEW UP AND MY FRIEND WAS LIKE TIFFANH GO FUCKING HELP HER UP AND I WAS LIKE PARALYZED STARING AT HER ASS AND THEN MY FRIEND WAS LIKE FUCKING SHIT TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN AND SHE LITERALLY HIT ME WITH A BIBLE AND I HAVE NO REGRETS NONE
This kills me every time
"TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN"
if this gets to 200k I will make “tiffany you useless lesbian” tshirts 😂
And in that moment, we were all Tiffany
where’s my shirt
due to low self esteem if someone is hitting on me i probably wouldn’t even be able to tell unless they directly said “i love you and want to date you” and even then i would be a little skeptical
I NEVER KNEW THE REASON THE NEPHEWS WERE LEFT WITH SCROOGE WAS BECAUSE DONALD HAD TO LITERALLY GO OFF WITH THE NAVY LIKE
I THOUGHT THE SAILOR GET UP WAS FOR SHOW IT DIDN’T OCCUR TO ME THAT DONALD WAS WITH THE US ARMED FORCES
#thank you donald for keeping our country safe
DON’T FUCK WITH THE DUCK
I may be an a-hole, but I’m not 100% a dick
The most inspiring thing I have ever heard (via drunkenkeith)
I love this duck
I never thought of that this is genius.
When I was considering homelessness, I already knew I’d be doing this. It makes so much sense. Planet Fitness is only $10 a month so it’s not like you wouldn’t be able to afford it.
a friendly reminder
real life P.S.A..
I’ve had friends that have done this when they needed to escape their unsupportive families.
by the way did I ever tell y’all about the time I got a blank message from nobody, sent on new year’s eve in 1969, when the internet didn’t exist?
because that happened
What the fuck
Or maybe its from 2069, when we’ve developed the technology to send data to the past. You sent yourself a blank message as a test but as the email address you used to send it doesnt exist yet, it came up as no sender
OKAY KIDS, LET’S LEARN ABOUT THE UNIX EPOCH
So back in the early days of computers, when we were trying to build clocks to keep all our computers in sync, we tried a bunch of different ways to synchronize them in ways that both normal people could use and programmers could utilize.
We just tried saying “The current time is THIS date” and just storing that date as some text, but while that was easy for humans, it was a bunch of different numbers that worked together in funny ways and computers don’t play nice with a bunch of random, arbitrary rules.
Not much worked, until we realized that we needed a BASELINE to compare against, and a way to represent the current time that covers everybody. So we came up with Unix time, because Unix was the style at the time. Essentially, Unix time represents any given time by saying “How many seconds ago was 12:00 AM on January 1, 1970 in Iceland somewhere?”. Recent enough to keep the numbers relatively small, far enough that nothing computer-y would fall before it, and consistent enough that there’d be no discrepancy based on where you are.
So what happens when you see the date “December 31, 1969” on a buggy message like this is that the computer received a bunch of zeroes by mistake and went “Oh, this must be a message!” Then when it tried to interpret it, it got to the date, found a zero, and said “Zero seconds since the Unix Epoch? I’ll round down - this was sent at the last second of New Year’s Eve, 1969! They’ll be so happy to finally get their blank message.”
And then the computer traipsed off on its merry way, because computers are fucking ridiculous.
This is frankly more hilarious than the 1969 time traveler theory
- must be following me
- reblog this post
- send me your birthday and your first name
- that’s all you have to do! every person who reblogs and sends me a message will be added c:what you will get
- a place on this birthday page
- a place on my updates tab during the week/month of your birthday (depending on how many people join)
- a promo on your birthday
- a happy birthday message!
1st zam broke and leaked oil all over the ice
I saw this without the caption and thought it was blood.
ＴＨＥＲＥ ＷＩＬＬ ＢＥ ＢＬＯＯＤ
Here we see the aftermath of a wild zamboni devouring it’s prey, a penalized hockey player, and the subsequent trailing back to it’s lair after a successful hunt.
The crowd looks on in a strange mixture of horror and relief. The zamboni will be satisfied for days. They are safe for now.
and now the weather